It rains all the time in California.

At least, that is the assumption one can make if they only lived in California from late last December until now.  Since I am the one specifically who had made that moved and lived here in that period – and we all know every observation I make is a 100% correct – it rains all the time.

The drought is just a figure of everyone’s imagination.

For serious, it has rained a lot here.  According to the National Oceanic & Atomospheric Administration (NOAA), the 28 days I have spent in California has seen at least a trace of rain 14 days or approximately every other day.  The data suggests that there has been as much as 8 inches of precipitation that has fallen in the last 30 days — which for you snow birds is the equivalent of nearly 50 inches of snow in that same time period.

According to the news reports from weather nerds (which so happens includes quotes from a guy from JPL), what’s going is that California is seeing what is described as Atmospheric Rivers.  These are troughs of pressure differences that suck up water from the Pacific Ocean, then streams in a line in-land slowly making it’s way south.  Many times, these start from the area near the Hawaiian Islands and get the more colorful (i.e. less nerdy) name of a Pineapple Express.  Some of the ones we have seen these last few weeks have been real toad chokers.  Some of these can carry as much water as what flows through the mouth of the Mississippi River … and then 14 more Mississippi Rivers.

For the most part, it isn’t heavy rains.  It’s drizzle and light showers and general wetness .. but all day and all night.  I guess it wouldn’t be so bad, but with the size of the lab, I am walking all the time to meetings — and I can guarantee you that it will be raining the hardest when I have a place to be.  It’s gotten so bad that we had to reschedule meetings that were supposed to be outside to places on the inside.  I KNOW … It’s Rough!  Do you know what its like to have meetings inside?

Life is so rough here, I tell you what.  I mean, yeah, I could be shoveling snow in Boston right now but … I’m in California.  It’s supposed to be warm beautiful and awesome.  Not wet, wet, and … wet.

PS … who got the joke in the title?  Come someone … Get it?  Crymea River?  Cry-Me-A River?  See, I can be funny.